Wednesday, August 21, 2002

Military Matters

Here's a partial transcript of this meeting :

Me - So, I mean, what's up?

Cheney - Well, Mister President, the options, vis-a-vis the Saddam problem, as they stand at the present time, with regards to the stated objective of regime chan-

Rice - C'mon, mothafucka! Spit it out, white boy!

Rummy - Hold on there, young missy. Heavens, that's no way for a lady to speak to the Vice-President of the United States, for gosh sakes!

Cheney - Thank you, Mister Secretary.

Rummy - I prefer to be called "Sun-Tsu", Dick.

Cheney - ...right...

Me - C'mon, fellers! What's the plan, man? Any ideas, Myers?

Myers - Well, my personal opinion is th-

Rice - Sho! You just let another crazy-ass honkey have his own personal soap-box! Jus' ignore the nigga bitch from Stanford! I'se jus' gonna sit my happy ass down at the back of this mofugging bus! IT BE RACISM!

Card - Condi, please...

Me - Gentlepersons! Let's show a little decoratium! We are discussing my plans for war, here! Now, does someone wanna tell me what my plans are???

Rummy - Nuke 'em all.

Cheney - Seconded.

Me - Done!

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