Thursday, August 01, 2002

My Plans For Iraq

Contrarious to populous beliefs, I do have a plan on my desk for the invasion of Iraq and the removal of Saddam Hussein from power there. And I wrote it myself! Here it is :

  • Invade from Kuwait with 27 million Marines and some light cavalry

  • Bomb Bag-daddy with pork rinds and Manischewitz wine

  • Encourage Bat-Man and his loyal sidekick Robin to trap Saddam and his two sons in the fearsome "titanium bat-cage"

  • Watch my polls go back to the high 80s

  • Win back the Senate and keep control of the House

  • Celebrate by chugging a six-pack of Aquafina and licking the First Lady's taco.

  • I'm still waiting for Rumsfeld's go-ahead. But I think it's a winner!

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