Man, what a horrible nightmare I had last night! And, no, it wasn't the one where the Supreme Court grants Al Gore squatter's rights to live inside a tent in the Rose Garden. It wasn't even the one where The Globe publishes pictures of Jenna doing keg-stands with Ted Kennedy at Mardi Gras.
In this one, I was giving a speech on the War, a real good one too. People were clappin' and cheering'; it reminded me of back when I was a cheerleader at Yale! Anyway, I got cocky and started to wing it, you know, all ex-temp-or-a-ne-ous-ly. I said, "We will fight terror. We will bring terror to its knees. We will fight you and your minions wherever and whenever you rear your vile head, Joseph Stalin!" Silence. Then some wit shouts, "Joseph Stalin? Joseph-fucking-Stalin? What the hell kind of War President are you? You don't even know what decade you're in!" And the crowd turned on me. Damn poll ratings prolly all shot to hell, too, but I never find out 'cuz I woke up, screaming and sobbing like a mildly retarded toddler. Woke Laura up too; she was so startled, I think her permasmile went away for a few seconds.
I'm tellin' ya, I haven't had a vision that terrifying since I had the DTs.
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