Tuesday, July 09, 2002

I'm in the news again today!

Who woulda thought?

That was one heck of a speech my people wrote for me. Woo-hee! I especially love this quote :

"We will use the full weight of the law to expose and root out corruption."

Note the phrase "root out". That's exactly what my speeches say I'm gonna do with terrism too! I can't wait 'til the next time I get to use "root out" in an important speech! The thought of it makes me feel giddy, just like when I knock back a six-pack of O'Doul's!

Let us ponder the possibilities :

  • "We must work with the United Nations to root out poverty in Africa."
  • "I intend to root out the Democrat majority in the Senate come November."
  • "Cheney wears his pants so high, we have to get Andy Card to root out Dick's tighty-whities from his asshole."
  • "If it were legal, I would use the full power of our intelligence services to root out David Gregory's entended family and put them into the ovens."
  • "Read my lips : root out!

Now if I could only convince Laura to let me take the root out of root beer. Heh.

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